Thoughts on the Cecils

This Sunday our lead pastors, Steve and Kim Cecil stepped down from their position in our church.  In August they (and their kids) are moving to Sochi, Russia where they will be training Russians to become pastors.  The day was one of celebration and prayer.  Here are some of my thoughts. 

First, I have to share the beginnings of our relationship.  About 5 years ago Cheryl and I were on the verge of quitting church completely.  We had been badly hurt by the pastor of the church where I had been on staff.  The abuse we had experienced had us ready to walk away from any form of organized religion.  I had just gotten back from taking a group of college students to New Orleans for a spring break mission trip.  While there I became friends with a wonderful young lady, Erin.  Erin was there to help with the ministry but lived in Madison, Wisconsin.  She hadn’t been attending a church on a regular basis so when we reconnected after returning to Madison I decided to help her find a church and maybe one that Cheryl and I could quietly attend.  I called probably 20 churches in Madison and mostly got voice mail.  Each time, I left a message telling who I was and about the campus ministry in which I was running.  I stated how I was hoping to find a church that my wife and I could attend and possibly some of my students.  

Steve was the ONLY pastor out of 20 that got back to me (actually, I think he was the only one to even answer his phone.)  I told him the same thing that I said on the voice mail of the other pastors I had tried to call and Steve said that he would love to meet me for coffee and chat.  A couple of days later we met at a coffee shop and talked.  He told me about the church, The Journey Community of Faith, and asked me about me and Cheryl.  I told him about my reluctance to become part of a church again but how The Journey sounded like a place we would be willing to visit.  Before we left Steve said “I’d like you to pray about what your role at The Journey is going to be.”  I replied “Now’s as good of a time as any” and we prayed right there.  That Sunday Cheryl, Erin, and I attended The Journey for the first time.  We knew we were home.

I started meeting with Steve on a semi weekly basis.  We talked in great depth about the hurt I experienced previously.  One question he asked, in reference to my previous lead pastor, was “Have you forgiven him?”  I’m pretty sure I went on in great detail with the many reasons why I didn’t need to forgive him because he didn’t deserve to be forgiven.  Steve was incredibly patient and, rather than tell me all of the reasons that I actually did need to forgive, asked many questions.  He asked if I deserved to be forgiven for all of the crap I’ve done in my life.  He asked how I could expect God’s grace if I wasn’t willing to extend the same.  “But the man is toxic to my spiritual and emotional wellbeing!” I protested.  Steve helped me to understand that forgiveness had nothing to do with continuing a relationship with a person, but everything to do with the feelings I was holding in my heart.  It took a while, but eventually, I was able to release the feelings of anger and hurt and let go.  I can honestly say that I have forgiven the man. 

Over the years Steve has encouraged me to pursue the call God has placed on my life to be a pastor.  He has been a friend, a role model, and a pastor.  So when we met this past fall and he told me that they were moving to Russia I blurted out, “So what does that mean for me?  Should I still get my pastor’s license?” 

Steve looked me in the eye and asked, “Who called you, God or me?” 

And Kim has been not just a voice of reason in the Cecil family, but also possesses an incredible amount of God given wisdom and is a gifted preacher.  I haven’t spent nearly as much time with her, but the quality of time greatly exceeds the quantity.  There have been many times when she’s spoken words into my life that I felt like she was speaking from a direct hotline with God.  And anyone who has ever had Kim pray over them knows what a powerful experience that can be!

So why am I not crying as I type this?  Why didn’t I cry during the farewell service? 
I think there are a couple of reasons. 

First, it’s not about me.  I am incredibly proud and inspired by their willingness to follow the call that God has placed on their lives.  I’m going to miss them like crazy.  But it would be selfish of me to want them to stay in Madison.  I think of the foundation that they have laid in here and I receive peace. 

I know that God didn't call them to leave, but he called them to go.  That might sound weird but bear with me for a second.  Steve and Kim were obedient and served the Lord to the best of their abilities in Madison.  They were used to train, teach and love us.  And now God has called them to a new task.  This means that it is time for them to use their gifts to meet the needs of a new group of people in a new culture.  And I honestly believe that God will provide someone to pick up in Madison where they left off. 

This could be a time of uncertainty.  We could freak out and start asking “Well what’s going to become of The Journey?”  But it’s like Steve said, “Who called you, God or me?”  It’s true that we don’t know what the future holds.  But isn’t that really part of our journey in life?  I like to think of it as an opportunity to see the amazing things that God can do if we allow Him.  Proverbs 3:5-6 says:

   

  Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
    do not depend on your own understanding.
     Seek his will in all you do,
    and he will show you which path to take.

I’m going to miss the heck out of Steve and Kim and the kids.  But I can’t wait until we hang out again some day.  I look forward to hearing the great things God will have done in their lives and to telling them what He will have done at The Journey and/or wherever He has called Cheryl and me.  I hope to some day be as much of a blessing to others as the Cecil’s have been (and will continue to be) to so many.